Now it came to pass that Eave vent had a couple of sons, Cane and
Gable vent. When Gable vent was born he was too wide to come out
the normal way so Eave had to have a G-section (Gabelian section).
That’s right it was called a Gabelian section for thousands of years before
Ceasar came along and appropriated the whole thing. Those Romans were
always stealing things and then re-naming them with roman names. Now of
course it is commonly known as a Cesarean section.
Well Cane vent was jealous of Gables notoriety, having a whole operation
named after him and all and as the story goes Cane vent was out riding
in a car with his buddies who were Hell’s Angels. They caught poor Gable
crossing the street and ran him over with their car.
His louvers were torn asunder and smashed beyond recognition.
A good Samaritan called 911 and gave him artificial ventilation until the ambulance arrived.
The EMT’s picked him up and took him to the Garden of Eden Memorial hospital but there
was nothing they could do. He expired in the Operating room without ever regaining consciousness.
There were eye witnesses and a trial was held in a ventilation court of law. Cane and his descendants
were sentenced to work in sewers for perpetuity. The Hell’s Angels and their offspring were
sentenced to ride motorcycles for all eternity.
Fortunately Gable was able to do a little multiplying and
begatting before the dastardly deed was done. His numerous progeny
can be found to this day in elevated positions around the globe.
However Gable vents are now under assault from another quarter, no less sinister.
Stay tuned to Roofing.com for further updates